I encouraged my wife to fuck other men before we opened our relationship. When she took the jump and she finally acted out both our fantasies, my number one fear was she was doing it for me. That she wanted to fulfill my fantasy and please me.
I no longer have that fear anymore and know that my wife enjoys being in a relationship where I am mostly monogamous and she is open to fuck whomever she wants.
Wait, aren’t cuckolds supposed to be completely monogamous? Kind of. I am bi-sexual so my wife is okay with me being with other men occasionally and sometimes at swinger events I’ll play with other women. Other than that, I am not to date, or have sexual relationships with other women. In our relationship if I did that I would cheat on my wife.
Some view this type of relationship as selfish. My wife and I listened to a Savage Lovecast where they discussed this and Dan Savage had the perfect explanation.
It is completely not selfish because it is what both in the couple want (desire). The male in a cuckolding relationship gets off on his wife dating and having sexual relationships with other men. It is also an enjoyable part of life for the wife for many reasons, which could include:
- Better sex
- More sex
- More love around you
- People to enjoy all parts of your life
- More honesty
- Deeper more connected relationships
- Feeling more sexually attractive and desired
- Feeling more alive
- Feeling of more abundance and less scarcity.
The funny thing is most of these benefits the husband also experiences.
Cuckolding is a type of female led relationship whereby the female can have sex with other men to satisfy her sexual urges. Cuckolding is also about a submissive husband who loves to see his wife sexually satisfied in ways he cannot provide. The husband is not replaced nor is the relationship. Fact, without the relationship, it cannot be cuckolding. The relationship remains the most important thing.
So it is absolutely not selfish for a wife to consensually cuckold a husband.
Listening to this podcast also was a glorious reminder because you the cuckold and wife need to remember this beyond just the sex for it to work.
Often in open relationships there are times where you have to negotiate over scheduling. When she is going to fulfill her and your desires with other men. As a cuckold there are times when you will have less time and attention from your partner – you are sharing her. Surprises might happen. You might not always have guaranteed access to your wife.
So it is a good reminder. She is not being selfish when:
- She is getting her hair and/or nails done while you take care of things at home.
- Spends time on the phone or texting with other men in your presence.
- Spends time shopping, getting dressed, doing her make-up.
- Has date nights out where she is gone with another man.
- Travels to see another man or vacations with another man for sex and romance.
- Is attracted to others and spends time flirting with them.
- Has a surprise encounter with another man.
- Spends time away after a date fucking another man
- Does some or all of these listed above while you do more to take care of the home so she has more time to do them. You spend more time taking care of the children, so she has more freedom to fulfil this part of the relationship.
It is not selfish, these are the cost and rewards of the cuckold relationship the husband agreed to and the relationship structure that was most likely encouraged from the start by the husband.
So if you are wife reading this. Enjoying all the benefits sexual and non sexual is not selfish. To the husbands reading this, remember this, when you get jealous or angst it is most often irrational.