In life he is not a submissive person, he can be controlling, a successful business person, strong minded and educated.
I have just finished reading a book called Practical FLR: A Woman’s Guide To Gentle Dominance. In this book which is based on submissive men and submissive male fantasies and how a woman can help direct fulfill them. Men who have deep desires to submit is something that simply won’t go away. Without it there is a sexual void.
The reality is cuckolding is not a female driven fetish, it is male driven. The deep root of cuckolding and why it is appealing for some men is because they are submissive. This is why so many fetishes are entwined into cuckolding which I discuss on this blog. A dominant female can also very much enjoy cuckolding her husband and making him submit to his sexual desires.
In the book the author speaks of two kinds of male submissive. The one I relate to is the Alpha Submissive. “He wants the woman to be his leader, but still have some control and influence in the relationship, he likely doesn’t have a submissive attitude in his daily life outside the relationship. He can also have a stronger personality and his own aura of authority at work, and is good at handling his own responsibilities and decision making. He may still want time for friends, hobbies, and maintain a life of his own, as well as submit to you totally sexually.”
As I have spent countless hours seeking answers to why I am the way I am sexually and why I have such powerful cuckold cravings, this book does a great job explaining the root of it all.
Submissive men experiment with and google search many of the above fetishes because they have to continue to fulfill this sexual void.
The fact is they are submissive men looking for someone to help dominate them sexually. I find this very interesting as I can recall the first time I truly was sexually dominated. Stripped and tied up intricately by ropes by another man.
Although I did not have any sexual attraction to this man, I felt very comfortable under his control. I liked the feeling of sexually submitting. Tied, used for pleasure then released brought me great pleasure. Kind of strange but true.
Was this part of the initial spark toward cuckolding, dominated in a straight heterosexual relationship by a women I am head over heals in love with, so sexually attracted to that I new I wanted to marry her the first moment I laid eyes on her? I am not sure.
Even when I went back to repeat the process with the dominant male of my early sexual experimentation I was conflicted, I have been conflicted with cuckolding in the past as well.
When I accepted that I am a submissive male, is when I accepted all my other desires and have decided to go with the flow of life and enjoy them.
Cuckolding can not be an everyday thing, there is just too many obstacles we haven’t figured out how to jump over…. family, kids, time for ourselves, our work.
There are things though that can be everyday and pleasurable sexually. Wearing panties, butt plugs, chastity, dominant and submissive sexual play with my wife and I.
I can’t speak for everyone, I have loved our cuckolding experiences and look forward to so many more if my wife will indulge, but I think what a cuckold is really looking for is much more than the act of his wife having sex with another man and enjoying it. He wants to be sexually dominated.